WordFood - how we feed or starve our realtionships

- Julia Hubbel

Julia’s ability to get this group of type-A executives to engage in true networking was incredible. She is truly skilled at motivating the group to engage and interact with each other, and her openness and honesty really come through.

— Shelley Stewart, Jr.,
Senior Vice President of Operational Excellence and Chief Procurement Officer, Tyco

June 24, 2012

Asking to be Fed WordFood

Filed under: Uncategorized — Tags: , , , , — Julia Hubbel @ 6:29 pm

Do you suffer in silence? Are you in a relationship where little is said and you hope for a kind word here and there? Perhaps you’ve been in this relationship for a long time, and there are habits of interaction and mind that have formed over the years. One of you comes home and the exchange goes like this:
Hi honey
Yeah hi
Howsa day
Howsa kids
Kids okay
Yah fine doing homework
Okay when’s dinner
‘Bout six
And at best you might get a small hug or a cheek buss at the door. And that’s the extent of your late day interaction.

And this, with the person you couldn’t WAIT to marry. You pined for and dreamed about.

Perhaps you’ve become resentful that your partner doesn’t notice that you wore something pretty today. Or that you have worn that sharp suit that takes ten pounds off your middle. Or perhaps you’re beginning to actually lose weight on that tough diet. Wouldn’t it be nice if they noticed and said something?

Sometimes, perhaps all too often, partners go on expecting the other to speak up first and neither does, and then there is an anger or resentment that begins. Well, you think, I won’t if she won’t. And she thinks the same thing. On it goes.

If we want to be fed delicious WordFood, sometimes the simplest thing to do is simply to ask for it. Tell your partner what you want to hear. They may have absolutely no clue what you need, what you crave, what you long for. And in fact if they did notice something it might be the wrong thing.

We need to teach each other our preferences for WordFood of love, and what feeds our souls. Let those we love know how we want to be acknowledged. Most of us want to please our partners and like to be needed. When given the chance to please, we often will.

Most of all, ask what others need first, and be willing to offer it. When you do this willingly, this is likely to open up a wonderful place in their hearts to reciprocate.

Try it next time you greet your partner. Say, do, be something different. Be appreciative. Find out what will feed their need to be seen as special. And watch them bloom.

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